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Dogs' Rules for Christmas
Author: unknown
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1. Be especially patient with your humans during this
time. They may
appear to be more stressed-out than usual and they will appreciate long
comforting dog cuddles.
2. They may come home with large bags of things they
call gifts. Do
not assume that all the gifts are yours.
3. Be tolerant if your humans put decorations on
you. They seem to get
some special kind of pleasure out of seeing how you look with fake antlers.
4. They may bring a large tree into the house and set
it up in a
prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations. Bizarre as this may
seem to you, it is an important ritual for your humans, so there are some
things you need to know:
* Don't pee on the tree...
* Don't drink water in the container that holds the tree..
* Mind your tail when you are near the tree..
* If there every packages under the tree, even ones that smell interesting or
that
have your name on them, don't rip them open...
* And Don't chew on the cord that runs from the funny-looking hole in the
wall to the tree.
5. Your humans may occasionally invite lots of
strangers to come visit
during this season. These parties can be lots of fun, but they also
call for some discretion on your part: Not all strangers appreciate kisses and
cleans.
* Don't eat off the buffet table. Beg for goodies subtly.
* Be pleasant, even if unknowing strangers sit on your spot on the sofa
-- they don't
know any better.
* Don't drink out of glasses that are left within your reach
unless you can get away with it.
6. Likewise, your humans may take you visiting. Here
your manners will
also be important:
* Observe all the rules for trees that may be in other people's houses.
* Respect the territory of other animals that may live in the house.
* Be nice to the kiddies.
* Turn on your charm big time.
7. A big man with a white beard and a very loud laugh
may emerge from
your fireplace in the middle of the night. DO
NOT BITE HIM!!!
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